Goodbye 2010

We will be celebrating a new year tomorrow. I bid goodbye to 2010 with a sense of fulfilment. Its been a wonderful and colourful year. Within the year I completed my term as the President of The Institution of Surveyors Malaysia (ISM) achieving all my set targets, climbed Mt Kinabalu overcoming my fear of heights, received my well-deserved PhD doctorate after 4 years of hard work (accompanied by blood, sweat and tears) and by January 2011 had served my duty as chair of QS Accreditation Council and Board member of the Board of Quantity Surveyors Malaysia.

It is customary that when the new year approaches we would make resolutions to become a better person or to kick that bad habits - start exercising, lose weight, do more charity work, spend more time with family, take up that hobby, learn another language, not to procrastinate, buy that chopard watch, quit smoking etc, etc . The new year gives us the opportunity to start afresh and embark on what we have been thinking of doing but waiting for that right time to do. And the right time is almost always a new year, a new beginning.

As for me since the beginning of the new millenium I have made a resolution not to wait for the new year to make new resolutions to better myself. At anytime, once I've made up my mind I would go for it and "Just do it" with the determination and passion that would sustain me until completion. And along the way I "don't stop believing" that I would succeed. Of course there were failures and in between the heartbreak, distress, depression and sadness I hang on to the words that "this will pass" to heal myself.  However I do have to admit that there are still some things that I have been procrastinating until today i.e. to start that exercise regime, to start on my book, to clear the clutter at home and office, to take up Mandarin class and to go to that karaoke singing session. I always end up with some reasons or other for not doing those things. And I hated and felt embarassed with myself as those reasons are, but mere excuses.

My wishlist for 2011 - My top 3 are wishing that Malaysians stop smoking, stop littering, and stop child abuse. Other wishes include for Malaysians to have pride in themselves, increased racial harmony, stop the politicking and concentrate in making Malaysia a better nation with everybody having a quality life.

Ina's dilemma

My daughter Ina, who is in her fourth semester of Interior Design diploma in UITM Sri Iskandar Perak, was offered the fast track to degree course in UITM Shah Alam. She is in dilemma whether to accept or not. She's hesitating as she is aiming for the President's Award being in the Dean's list for all her past three semesters. Neither is she keen to be in the Degree course as she will be in the same class with Diploma graduates and Post-Diploma graduates with years of experience. That scenario fears and distresses her.

She sought advice from her friends and lecturers. Her colleagues who were also offered are all in a dilemma along with her. Each waiting for others to decide. Ina turned to her circle of closed ones for advice - which confused her more!!! Her father was ecstatic and encourage her to go for it. Big brother, Along said "Nooooo - no need for any fast track. Why want fast track - enjoy student life". Her second brother, Angah, who just came back from Sydney after a month of training said "Hold on - will she be graduating same year as me? No? then go lah!!!". Her cousin who has been working after graduating the ID diploma course in UITM several years ago said "Go for it - Ina's design is good.". Amer, her cousin said if it was him he would not but Ina should as "Ina boleh". Her other two cousins had gone for the fast track degree as "they just want to get it over with". Ina asked me about sembahyang Istikharah.

To me its a no brainer - its a simple YES. She will be in Shah Alam not 350km away. The President's award which she so desires requires another 3 semesters of Deans list - which is still not a sure thing. She definitely has to work hard in the fast track but she still has to work hard for her diploma if she's aiming for the Deans list for the next 3 semesters. Just add another one more semester and she will be going home with a degree instead of diploma. Furthermore its not that she is ecstatically happy there as she is just tolerating the strict environment so she will not miss the place. But I know I'm no more in the position to decide and tell her what to do. We can only advise and steer her towards making what we felt is best for her. She has to judge herself and make the decision not due to fear but what is good for her.

Then she decides - she's not going to accept the offer. She wants a full proper education and training at her own pace - and a diploma. Degree can come later. Although disappointed we accept her decision - maybe she has made the right decision for her.

A daughter's choice

I attended the funeral of a close friend's father last week. I felt emotional, melancholic and homesick so I called my aged mum in Melaka and said yes we will balik kampung next weekend and, yes we will arrange a family gathering and add in for good measure that my son who will be coming back from Melbourne is dying to see her. In fact we will be going back from Friday morning. She was ecstatic and over the moon and I could hear her voice full of emotion and quivering with anticipation and happiness. She counted loudly that she will have us for 3 whole days.

Then Katherine of ISM reminded me that I was to represent ISM as one of the panellists in the IEM forum on Project Management to be held on the same Saturday. OH NO!! I was still pondering over what to do when I received another email from her informing that the forum is postponed. I was relieved as I don't have to choose but she continued and reminded me that I now can attend the  ISM Extraordinary General Meeting to amend ISM Constitution and Byelaw also to be held on that Saturday. OH NO again - why oh why did I not put in all these events in my head, my diary and the i-phone. I cursed myself for being an idiot. And to top that when I met the ISM President, he requested that I accompanied him together with the Deputy President and Dato Mukhriz Mahathir on the stage prior to the EGM.

I hesistated on the choice of mum or ISM!!!. I mean I could attend ISM event and postpone the balik kampung the next week. I'm still going back but not this week. And furthermore half of my siblings can't make it for the family gathering so maybe if we postpone it to next week........... I am still being a dutiful and devoted daughter, am I not? My mum would understand, wouldn't she? I called my husband and he said "You promised her". I still hesitated - Yes I did but .............

I woke up early this morning and I noticed an eyelash on my cheek. Malays belief that it meant someone is missing you. At that moment I knew what I should do.